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April 27, 2008 was Youth Sunday at Holy Family. Three of our high school graduating seniors spoke, and their remarks are detailed here.
Krista Anne Nordgren
Alison Kibbe
Taylor Coil
April 27, 2008
Krista Anne Nordgren
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Church of the Holy Family
Hi. My name is Krista Anne Nordgren, and I am a senior at Carolina Friends. I am eighteen years old and in the fall I’ll be going to college in Illinois. These facts describe what I'm doing right now, but the core of who I am cannot be captured in these details. I want you to see me as something deeper as I stand before you today. I am the baby that was plunged into the baptismal font, I am the dripping baby that was raised up, as everyone shouted AMEN! I am the one to whom you made a promise. When the celebrant turned and asked, Will you who witness these vows do all in your power to support this person in her life in Christ? you answered, WE WILL. So I am here today, to share my life in christ that you have supported since I was marked and sealed as Christ's own, and to encourage you to keep in mind your promise, and of course, to thank you.
My earliest memories of my Christian journey are as a four year old attending St. Stephen’s Episcopal Church in Durham and walking down the isle in a princess crown, silk scarf and plastic high heels. Old family friends tell my mom that they would go to church each Sunday in anticipation of what I would wear next. I thought I was getting married every week. After that I had the immense pleasure of going to Holy Family. I had wonderful Sunday school teachers and classes and it was there I met Alison Kibbe who would become a very close friend. I was introduced to the stories of the bible in a tangible and livable way, through things like making bricks at Vacation Church School. I learned to sing God’s praise in Miss Jills Choir, and I had some profound conversations, not to mention a food fight, a game of fear factor and tons of fun in EYC. I found Brown Summit as a place at the end of middle school to get impassioned for Jesus. But as the road wore on towards high school, I found it to be getting more and more rocky.
More freedom and more responsibility brought more confusion as to what my path was heading towards. I felt as though the world was pulling me in a million directions and aspirations of fitting in with my peers began to win out over aspirations of doing God’s will.
Two months into my freshman year in a brand new high school, I got suspended for drinking a bottle of wine with some other students at a school sleepover. I was searching for acceptance and I was trying to impress my new friends. When I realized what I had done, and that I was now separated from school for a week, I was completely ashamed and embarrassed. I felt as though everyone was looking at me with a glance that said, How could you? I felt like I didn’t get to be the person that I wanted to be in my community anymore because it seemed as though people were treating me differently, and I started to think of myself as a bit of a delinquent. Although I worked very closely with God during this time, without my community I didn’t have a place to manifest God’s work in my life. I questioned my dedication and my value to the world around me.
Luckily, as this was going on, weekly sessions of Journey in Faith were just beginning. I very recently found emails that I exchanged with my sponsor, Cathy Leslie on the exact subject of the trouble in school. As I started to attend the regular meetings in which we examined our baptismal covenant, I realized that instead of moving on, the church was holding a place for me as I was away with my own struggles. Because of my baptism, I have a place at God’s table. Because of your promise to me, I know that, no matter where I am Saturday night, Sunday morning, I can come to church. This church is continuing on it’s spiritual calendar, every week people, people who are bringing their own struggles, their own imperfections, are gathering to kneel down side by side, receiving communion from the same cup. Here people will be standing beside me, as I examine my conscience, remember my aspirations to do God’s will, and then we all kneel at the altar together. And that makes me feel as though I am truly part of a Holy Family.
I am every baby, and I have had the privilege to grow. I am eighteen years old now, and launching out to a new adventure. I’m thankful I have had a place in this church where I have been encouraged and cared for. I think about how many more babies will be baptized in these waters this year, and now when the celebrant turns to me to ask if I will do what is in my power to support them in their life in Christ, I am ready to join the crowd in saying, WE WILL.
April 27, 2008
Alison Kibbe
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Church of the Holy Family
Good morning. My name is Alison Kibbe. I’ve been a member of Holy Family for longer than I can remember; at least 15 years. So I’ve been to a lot of youth Sundays and heard a lot of senior homilies. Ever since I was little I’ve imagined what I would say when it was my turn, but now that I’m actually faced with the task of delivering my own personal testimony, it is drastically different (and much more difficult) than I expected, because I’m not that same little girl. God has led me to experiences that have helped me grow in my understanding of Him, so the way I see, feel and hear God speaking to me and how I interpret and articulate that is something that I could have never predicted.
In Acts, Paul says to the Athenians, “God has made from one blood every nation of men to dwell on all the face of the earth, and has determined their pre appointed times and the boundaries of their dwelling so that they should seek the Lord.” This verse immediately stood out to me because looking back on the past years I can clearly see how God has been leading me to seek him through the places, situations and people he has put in my life.
Even if I didn’t know it at the time, I see that God was equipping me with the tools to thirst and hunger after him, and put that into action in my life. Sometimes I could feel that it was right, sometimes it felt very wrong, and many times it was the exact opposite of what I expected, but can see that God was there with me, helping me figure it out, and challenging me to grow.
I am a proud cradle Episcopalian, and come from a household where Sunday means church. If it’s Sunday, we’re at church. And it isn’t Sunday; we’re probably at church anyways. I applaud and thank my mother for this feat. I know this is where my faith started. I have many “parents” throughout Holy Family, who introduced me to scripture, sacramental life to help me form the foundation of my faith, but to a certain extent it was something I did as opposed to a part of who I was.
Then in middle school I started attending diocesan youth events at the Summit. Through different methods of prayer, song, meditation and fellowship my faith transformed from something I did because it was expected, into something that was a part of me. I began taking active ownership to develop my relationship with Christ and as a member of the Diocesan Youth Committee I was given the opportunity to share my faith with others and develop as a leader.
My experience at the Summit led naturally to my participation in Duke Youth Academy, a 2-week theology program for high school juniors and seniors. We were challenged to “swim in our baptismal waters” by studying and living our baptismal covenant in intentional Christian community. Exploring my faith intellectually, spiritually and physically, challenged me to evaluate what I was doing and where I was going. My faith became the filter through which I viewed my experience.
As we discussed, learned, and explored what the baptismal covenant meant, the grounded faith I developed over the years was strengthened, but not undisturbed. Questions were raised and I discovered how revolutionary our faith is. How I had already died in Christ, I was risen through Christ, and the huge risk and commitment my baptism was. How my Christianity was what truly defined me because in my baptism I was baptized into the Body of Christ and out of all of the world’s definitions. Marked as Christ’s own, which meant my life was His. What Dr. Fred Edie, the program director, always said was true “As baptized Christians the question is not whether you are called to ministry, but rather what type of ministry?” As a Christian, I don’t get to create my own story, but I get to live in God’s. And this means my life will be radically different from society’s expectations.
In our last session Fred quoted Fred Buechner’s definition of vocation saying, "The kind of work God usually calls you to is the kind of work that you need most to do and that the world most needs to have done... the place where your deep gladness and the world's deep hunger meet." In that moment I felt all the pieces of a puzzle came together. I saw how my interest in languages and cultures, time studying development in school and trip to El Salvador were all steps on a journey leading me to a calling in international development. I felt great joy and excitement that I had found my little niche in God’s story. I thought I had it all figured out.
But instead at school, I found myself frustrated academically and socially. I was juggling way too many balls, spread too thin, but doing nothing I really cared about. I was so consumed by other things that I couldn’t focus on what God was calling me to. I felt like I just didn’t fit in. I knew I needed a change but I was scared of what that would mean. I remember the weekend when I was forced to confront the fact that my expectation of high school and what I was supposed to be doing were not God’s plans for me. I felt completely lost, vulnerable and out of control.
That weekend my mom was going through her own struggle; stranded in the airport unable to make it to the funeral service of a close friend. We were both overwhelmed by our complete powerlessness, and she said, “Sometimes God cuts our feet out from under us to tell us to stop following our own plan and start following his.”
I had been reluctant to make the changes I needed so God put me in a position where I was forced to surrender. There wasn’t a miraculous shift, I still felt lost, but I lifted my hands up and said “OK God, I have no idea where I am or what I’m doing, so tell me where you want me.” It was time to put what we had talked about at Duke into practice. Was I really able to give up and let God take over? Especially if it meant that my life would be very different from those around me.
I accepted that fact that I was in a different place than my friends and classmates, and that was OK. For me to continue growing in my relationship with God I needed to follow His story, and it happened that it didn’t follow the normal timeline for high school. Just when I decided I would finish school early so I could work abroad, God led me to Haiti with Holy Family. I once again I saw God pushing me to seek Him and in February I returned to Cap Haitien to live, learn and teach.
So although my senior year has been untraditional, I can honestly say that I’ve never been more at peace with myself or what I’m doing, because I feel like I am in my “pre appointed time and place” so God is not far from me. I’m comfortable with my nebulous identity in this gray area between high school and college. I am incredibly excited about next year when I will attend Duke and UNC in the Robertson Scholars program. I know that these opportunities will open the door for more experiences to serve, grow and seek the Lord and it would not be possible if I hadn’t let go, and let God.
So I don’t know exactly what will happen next or where God will lead me in the future but I do know that if I can let myself surrender, let go of my plans and society’s expectations (a tall order I know) that I will be able to hear where he is leading me.
But, I still can’t believe that I’m standing up here, coming to the end of my talk. Something I’ve anticipated for so many years. There is so much more I wish I could say. Many memories and most of all thank you to this community for all the love, support and guidance. And in my attempt to summarize my spiritual journey into a concise 5-minute homily I feel like I’m deceiving you. It hasn’t been neat and tidy and it wasn’t a passive journey. It required the active participation of not just myself, but many others who helped me along the way.
God worked through people to push me, especially when I didn’t want to be pushed. They rolled me out of bed and to church and encouraged me to get involved in programs, which equipped me with the skills to develop my faith and then challenged me to put it to use to develop worships, keynotes and coordinate conferences.
So Holy Family, I have a challenge for you. As members of the body of Christ, it is our responsibility to help youth on their journey. At every baptism we make a commitment to “do all in our power to support these persons in their life in Christ.” This is the time that youth are trying to find their place so they need to be led to experiences that will motivate them to seek the Lord. And we need to provide those opportunities.
But this doesn’t mean do it for them. Church should be a place where youth are challenged to step up and step outside their comfort zones because we will celebrate when they succeed and help them get back up when they fail. We cannot be afraid of mistakes. Don’t be afraid to give youth responsibility, it is the only way we will learn to be responsible. We will surprise you with how capable we truly are. And only through the voice and actions of youth, will real youth ministry be possible; the kind that moves us beyond a Sunday faith, to a faith that defines our life.
This means we’ll have to take a risk. It won’t be easy. But God has placed our Church at a crossroad in our mission, and we must take advantage of this opportunity to seek, grope for and find the Lord. To make real and lasting changes to ensure that our next generation finds their place in God’s story.
April 27, 2008
Taylor Coil
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Last changed: May 8, 2008